import 4.code.options;
import 4.code.about;

class Header{

public void title(){

String fullTitle = "/an/ - Animals & Nature";

public void menu();

public void board();

public void goToBottom();

public void refresh(a);

class Thread extends Board{
public void EmptyTitle(OP Anonymous){

String fullTitle = "EmptyTitle";
int postNumber = "2837927";
String image = "EA91F06A-C3B6-4C19-AAA5-5DEDFB833C98.jpg";
String date = "10/08/18(Mon)21:02:46";
String comment = ">get banned from the zoo
Guess I’ll just start my own damn zoo."

public void comments(){
if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837929 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:04:42")

Okay, which animal did you try to fuck?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837933 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:06:30")

None of them."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837936 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:08:02")

Okay, which plant did you try to fuck?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837942 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:10:48")

how drunk were you?
how much of an autistic asshole are you?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837943 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:10:48")

How'd ya get banned, OP?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837965 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:24:39")

"I always wanted to start my own zoo. It'd be focused on the less known biotopes of nature and it wouldn't have any of that ugly fake coral and fake rocks that most zoos have.";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837966 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:24:48")

Wasn’t drunk. My autism definitely showed, but I was going through some shit.

A year ago on September 11th, I ducked under the railing in the giraffe house at Denver Zoo. One of the giraffes dropped a branch and I tried to “give it back” by holding it straight up in the air for them.

A zookeeper saw me and reee’d so I left. So security follows me to my truck and just as I’m about to leave he asks me if I did etc. Like an autistic asshole, I said yes and followed him back to the zoo. Police were involved, was given a citation for trespassing. A year later, they’re still trying to take me to court for it.

I’m unironically going to start my own zoo."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837970 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:27:03")

>A year ago on September 11th
where were you when the world stopped turning
on that denver day"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2837985 && dateTime=="10/08/18(Mon)21:32:43")

>I always wanted to start my own zoo
Same. This might just be the push I needed all along.

I’ve done my research and given it a lot of thought. They key, like any business, is to start small. So I’m starting out with a mobile petting zoo."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838347 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)04:39:27")

Denver zoo is shit anyways, make the journey to the cheyenne mountain zoo, its a million times better"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838348 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)04:41:24")

Denver Zoo called CMZ and told them I’m some sort of giraffe molester or something."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838382 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)05:51:20")

just tell them jews did 9/11 then talk about how usury is a jewish scam."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838384 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)05:53:06")

"tfw a woman could 110% get away with this cause it's always beta trash genes or sociopaths pushing these cases";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838387 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)05:58:27")

>get banned from zoo because you're a dipshit
>you're such an weird autistic fuckup they feel the need to call all the other zoos in the area to warn them about you.
>thinks you're going to start a successful business in a field with a worse failure rate than restaurants.
yeah ok"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838405 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)06:44:32")

I don't know OP fucked up really badly so much as the zoos are simply playing it safe as possible. Someone with a history of going into the exhibits for any reason is a huge liability to have in your zoo, since no one wants to have the next Harambe incident happen in their zoo and/or get sued."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838425 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)07:44:01")

"Use GW Zoo in Oklahoma as a starter example. Joe Exotic even has some badass videos of his park on YouTube. The park is open but he's in jail but such is life here out in the southern countryside.";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838427 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)07:45:25")


if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838590 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:23:13")

You never been to Denver Zoo, have you? There was no way I could get into the exhibit."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838593 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:28:39")

>is a giant fuck up
>blames everyone else for his fuck ups
you've never been tested for autism have you? there's no way you'd pass."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838599 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:34:44")

This is worded so weirdly. Did you go into the enclosure or did you just put your head over the railing?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838600 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:36:38")

After the railing, there’s a ten foot tall steel bar fence. I don’t think I could climb that even that if I wanted to. Keep acting like I actually put myself or the giraffes in danger, though.

Also, any sources on the success or failure or rates of private zoos?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838602 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:38:56")

*success or failure rates of private zoos"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838607 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:43:08")

>Keep acting like I actually put myself or the giraffes in danger, though.
what ever you say, giraffe fucker."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838610 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:44:58")

I don't think there's any success or failure rates available online because almost nobody ever does it but try looking into how to set up museums. Or you could do what this one guy did (the owner of the monitor lizard that was on kids shows) and start up a exotic pet store and then transition it into a little zoo later on."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838614 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:47:30")

Also there's this one small zoo in France (forgot the name, sorry) that's pretty popular with mostly turtles and small aquariums and he charged something like ten euros a visitor so he made a pretty okay profit from it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838620 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)12:51:35")

>giraffe fucker
I have a legal right to the security footage of what happened. I’ll get it and post a webm if you want."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838668 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)14:21:48")

">try to touch an animal that is known to kill people
>get banned


if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838683 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)14:38:24")

>known to kill people

Fucker please, those Israeli pigs were just mad I didn’t pay another $25 to feed the giraffes. It used to be $5.

I’m not kidding about Denver Zoo’s kikery. They would much rather rent the open space by the giraffe house for a gay wedding or whatever event you feel is so important to put on during the middle of the day than let families picnic there and enjoy the zoo like they paid to."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838712 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)15:07:16")

>things cost money
>mommy didnt give me enough good boy points to feed the giraffe
>how dare the zoo make as much money as possible
>im going to start my own zoo and its going to be cheap, im not going to need money to run my zoo!"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838728 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)15:24:33")

Yeah I’m a contrarian, too, but you’re just being retarded.

Why not hold private events after the zoo closes instead? Just saying."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838759 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)16:14:05")

>why not hold private events after zoo closes
>zoo hours : 9am - 4pm
you have 2 choices as the zoo
>option A
have a section of park reserved for party during zoo hours.
employees are payed normal wage, no one works extra hours

>option B
hold party after hours
have to have employees stay hours later than normal, have to pay them overtime
or have to bring in temporary employees to set up / monitor / clean up party at additional cost

hmmm, i wonder why they hold parties during operating hours"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838770 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)16:29:52")

>have to have employees stay hours later than normal
They are staffed 24/7, not just during public hours."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838790 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)16:58:31")

staffed =/= fully staffed, the after hours people are taking care of the animals, cleaning and security. if you have a party after hours you need more employees after hours which is more money. how is this hard to understand? that's like saying movie theaters need to only hold parties after hours, because they have employees working before they open and after they close already. if you can not comprehend why you are wrong, i feel sorry for the animals you may end up getting because they will starve."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838813 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)17:31:33")

>cleaning and security
What else do you need that the people paying for the event aren’t hiring?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838825 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)17:42:47")

t. NEET who's never worked a day in his life"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2838830 && dateTime=="10/09/18(Tue)17:46:18")

Real informative."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839158 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)00:51:05" && image=="IMG_1168.png")

>Keep acting like I actually put myself or the giraffes in danger, though.
Doesn't matter you silly fuck, even people get harmed at zoos doing stupid shit for the staff to be reasonably concerned. They can't tell your intent, nor could they tell whether or not the giraffe would've kicked you to death if you'd actually tried and succeeded in climbing that fence. Why would they risk some autist doing it again, actually getting killed, and having the family try suing?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839176 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:34:37" && image=="DB7AB9E4-5E44-49B9-A1D8-DC1AFDE043B7.jpg")

Most hosted events at zoos and museums are after hours. The client, usually some corporation or firm, makes a sizeable donation, gets their names on a brick, and hires outside caterers who handle all the setup, food, cleaning and security. How do you not know this? It’s like you’re working class poor or something."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839178 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:43:24" && image=="84BE004E-8C19-46CF-A409-E4E1C2470B62.jpg")

>giraffe fucker"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839179 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:43:44")

>tried and succeeded in climbing that fence
I’m autistic, not retarded or suicidal. I don’t really blame Denver Zoo, anyways. What hurts is not only that I was banned from CMZ, but that the guest services director at CMZ actually pretends that the ban has nothing to do with what happened at Denver or that Denver Zoo ever had contact with them."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839182 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:46:44")

>banned from Denver zoo
>decide to start your own zoo
>banned from Morrison museum
>decide to collect fossils on your own
I'm sensing a pattern here
You need to get banned from University Hospital so you can go cure cancer or something"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839183 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:49:26")

>I'm sensing a pattern here
Yeah I had a complete psychotic breakdown that about ruined my life. Keep being a cunt about it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839184 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:51:17")

sorry to hear that.
are you taking anything? Psychosis is a bitch. You don't generally come across as schizophrenic on /an/."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839187 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:53:21")

also I remember the zoo banning incident and I still think it's bullshit. Those railings don't block anything and lots of people pass them."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839188 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:55:16")

Yeah I took abilify for a while but I quit it after I gained fifty pounds. I am a lot better than I was last year, except I’m terribly unhappy."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839193 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)01:58:37")

I think unhappiness is normal in adults. I've never tried Prozac but it worked on my wife."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839195 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)02:00:34")

>A year ago on September 11th

Why is that relevant?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839200 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)02:03:34")

Ah well. I would have wanted to start my own zoo, anyway. I want to call Matt and apologize for what happened and see if he could give me a second chance, but I really don’t have the nerve.
That was literally the day I was banned from the Denver Zoo for life and I will always remember it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839204 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)02:09:04")

It'll be fine, you're going to be fine. Have you applied to volunteer at DMNS this year?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839206 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)02:13:27")

I probably have a better chance of convincing Matt to let me back into the Morrison than ever getting picked to volunteer at DMNS. With that said, I haven’t. Should I?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839266 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:34:04")

that isnt what the dude was complaining about. he was complaining that people were able to rent the park area for birthdays and weddings DURING business hours. no shit if you rent it after hours it costs a fuck load of money, did you not read what i the op wrote?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839272 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:38:13")

September 11 was either less than a year ago or more than a year ago, you autistic piece of shit."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839278 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:48:15")

They have a pavilion for kid’s birthday parties. But that big green lawn shaded by big cottonwoods to the side of the giraffe house should be for regular people to picnic. I hated seeing corporations queue that entire space off for their gig in the middle of the day. >>2839272
Nigger 2017 was last year."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839280 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:50:27")

"after reading this whole thread OP, i think you need to work out your personal issues first before you try and start a zoo. im not trying to be mean here, in fact i would love for you to succeed, the country needs more zoo's and good exotic pet stores. if starting a zoo or exotic pet store is something that is very important to you then you dont want to fuck it up. As much as i can tell just from reading your posts, you still have some work to do.";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839282 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:52:24")

>September 11 was either less than a year ago or more than a year ago, you autistic piece of shit.
dude as autistic as OP is, what he said makes perfect sense and you are just being an idiot
>A year ago on september 11
go back to this last sepember 11.. almost a month ago. do you still follow me? it was a year prior to that."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839284 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:54:44")

>you need to work out your personal issues first

Could u not be so vague

Like I said, the key is to start small. I’m thinking very small, like Nigerian dwarf goats."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839285 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:55:03")

to add to this, i really do hope you get better and work things out. psychosis is really terrible, i have a very close friend who has struggled with it in the past. but it took him taking a very long time off of work and solely trying to fix that."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839287 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)03:59:06" && image=="082DEAAD-06B1-4C38-B636-7E49081DFBF8.png")

/an/ is the only reason I go on 4chan desu y’all my niggas"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839289 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)04:00:33")

"Last year" is very different from "a year ago.""

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839292 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)04:03:43")

an idea for "getting the word out" would be to contact different elementary schools in the your area, and bringing the animals there.
set up the petting zoo out in the fields, or if you have more "exotic" do an assembly.
i remember having "the reptile man" come every year and bring a bunch of cool herbs and talking about them. everyone loved it. and herps are easier to take care of in terms of space and cost than most other animals."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839304 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)04:27:31" && image=="1532658812879.jpg")

>/an/ is the only reason I go on 4chan desu y’all my niggas
me too"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839314 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)05:04:46")

I've noticed quite a few /an/ons here are in Colorado. I dont like knowing I live near so many autists"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839568 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)14:03:13")

>With that said, I haven’t. Should I?
can't hurt. Maybe call Matt and apologize and ask him to give you a nice reference."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2839637 && dateTime=="10/10/18(Wed)15:41:33")

>I'm autistic, not retarded"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840931 && dateTime=="10/11/18(Thu)22:39:58")

>retarded : adj : less advanced in mental, physical, or social development than is usual for one's age.
>autism : noun : a mental condition, characterized by difficulty in communicating and forming relationships with other people and in using language and abstract concepts.
hate to break it to you anon... but you're retarded."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840976 && dateTime=="10/11/18(Thu)23:33:43")


You are legitimately and figuratively retarded. Who cares about your mental illnesses, you are an autist and will never learn any lesson. Good thing they banned you."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840984 && dateTime=="10/11/18(Thu)23:44:12")

There is heightened security on September 11th because of muh towers. He picked the worst possible day in America to be seen trespassing."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840993 && dateTime=="10/11/18(Thu)23:57:04")

No it isn't

You people are retarded. OP is obviously in the right and we should encourage him to build the zoo. I used to dream about having a koala sanctuary (and still might when I retire). You should get the permits, build your own zoo, and tell those weird establishment people to fuck off."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840996 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:01:34")

Do you niggers work for Denver Zoo security or something? I’ve seen spics feed giraffes in that giraffe house and stream it live on Facebook. Kids cross that railing all the fucking time. Matter of fact, I was one of those kids. If they gave a fuck about people’s and the giraffe’s safety, that barrier would have been glass long before now. Goddamn, that building was opened in 1966, for fuck’s sake. Update the motherfucker."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2840999 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:04:52")

Like I said, 9/11. And adults are more suspicious than children."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841011 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:28:04")

Denver Zoo has banned minors for life before. They’ve banned people just for being there when a trespassing happened.
Thank you, anon."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841014 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:38:25")

he's being polite.

you keep getting banned from places, and it's not just on 9/11. You admit you're autistic and occasionally psychotic. The real reason you keep getting banned is obvious to any normal person. When you fuck up you act in some abnormal way that sets people against you instead of being a human and apologizing and acting like a normal person does.

your handicap makes you seem suspicious and unlikable. You're being punished for that."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841015 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:42:32")

Doesn’t help he is autistic and simply does not understand what is going on around him.
It may be likely he simply does not even know the full reason because of his many mental handicaps. He should have a caretaker of his own, really."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841016 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:44:11")

or at the very least plead his mental disability when they ban him. Just be like, "sorry, I'm retarded, here's my handicapped placard."

at that point employers and most public businesses can't do much to you."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841019 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:50:48")

>occasionally psychotic
>you keep getting banned from places
I had one psychotic break over a year ago. I got banned from Denver Zoo and the Morrison within a week of each other. I don’t “keep getting banned from places”.
Shut the fuck up, nerd."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841026 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)00:58:46")

regardless, the reason you're getting banned while other people that cross the rail don't is because of you, not the date. Your response to confrontation is not appropriate or normal, and people respond in turn to that.

and one psychotic break over a year ago is very good reason to believe you're delusional most of the time."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841035 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:09:09")

Yea, and that breakdown is a result of your mental instability. You are obviously not much better nowadays regardless of your meds or general state of happiness, you said as much in this thread.
You confront anything that might put blame on you onto others. You barely understand the reasons given and always drift the conversation apart, so it is only natural to assume you shift such things anywhere else as well."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841039 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:10:02")

>Your response to confrontation is not appropriate or normal
Bro, the zookeeper told me to fuck off and I did. I remember how I asked if I could at least keep the branch to make acacia leaf pressings and the bitch took it from me and snapped it into pieces. So I left the zoo. I was literally about to put the key in the ignition and leave when a security guard knocked on my window and asked if I crossed the barrier. I admitted it like a man and followed him back thinking I was going to get a slap on the wrist and I could maybe explain I was just having a hard time and that I wouldn’t do it again. The zoo manager never even looked at me when he told security I’m banned. It was all over walkie talkie."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841042 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:12:25")

>I asked if I could at least keep the branch to make acacia leaf pressings

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841044 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:12:38")

>You confront anything that might put blame on you onto others
But I don’t. I’ve admitted I fucked up. I’ll admit it again: I fucked up. I’m not bitching and crying about how unfair it all is. I just want to start my own zoo like I’ve wanted to all my life, anyways."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841046 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:13:59")

You've implied all over this thread you don't think the ban is fair and the zoo staff were being unreasonable."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841048 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:19:59")

Refer to >>2839179."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841061 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:35:00")

>I asked if I could at least keep the branch to make acacia leaf pressings
this is something I have trouble teaching my autistic son.

when someone is mad at you that's not the time to try to make friends or show off how much you know. That's when you shut up and listen to what they have to say.

autistic children have trouble with that. Sometimes you have to shut your mouth and listen to what people have to say. IRL nothing you have to say matters to anyone anyways. Nobody cares what you think unless you're also able to listen to them."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841062 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:35:25")

"ITT anoniggers being cunts to some random autist that just wants to build his own zoo and move on with his life

Who hurt you, anons? Did some zoo trespassin’ autist steal your girl and start a zoo with her? Lmfaooo"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841063 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:36:49")

Because it's a retarded idea and private zoos tend to suck dick as far care of the actual animals go."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841064 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:36:55")

It was pretty fucking cheeky of me and I knew it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841065 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:37:57")

Key is to start small, anon."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841067 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:40:07")

How can he take care of others when he can’t take care of himself. He‘d die before his animals as well"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841068 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:40:46")

I'm ignoring his zoo fantasies because I think it's a great idea that he'll never get to do because he can't hold a job.

the first step to starting his amazing Muscle Zoo of Danger and Excellence is to learn how to interact with normal people so he can make money."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841069 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:41:58")

>because he can't hold a job
Where the hell did you infer that from?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841070 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:42:23")

you're all good then

if you know how you're fucking up and do it anyways that's a choice you make. It's not a good choice or a productive one, but at least you'll have stories to tell the grandkids.
If you manage to reproduce."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841071 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:43:31")

Morrison Museum firing story"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841073 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:45:32")

That was a volunteer job, idiot. I never even thought of it as firing until I told my friends and they said “you got fired from a volunteering job?” We had a good laugh about it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841080 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:57:09")

that just makes it worse."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841081 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)01:58:46")

Go suck a cock, faggot."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841083 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:00:28")

Did you mean Museum Zoo of Danger and Excellence? That is a pretty badass name, but I was thinking of naming it after my livestock brand."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841084 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:00:30")

>go suck a cock, faggot
yes, exactly
this is exactly why you'll never have any money to start a zoo."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841086 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:02:35")

Holy shit, an autist did steal your girl."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841087 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:04:18")

this is literally you
kicked out so you're going to start your own badass zoo/museum/mall/coffee shop/whatever other thing you've been kicked out of"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841091 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:06:43")

Thanks for the laugh, anon. I haven’t seen Year One in a while."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841098 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:15:49")

It's funny but it's also sad. Jack Black is pretending to be a moron for laughs. OP is just that moron irl."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841101 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:18:10")

Fuck it, nigger, Columbus took a chance. Why shouldn’t he?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841104 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:24:19")

You’re right, going into business is a stupid idea. Good thing you’re too smart to try and succeed."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841110 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:36:48" && image=="9739EB49-ED5E-47F6-94DA-D9928E9A7A83.jpg")

"Now that I have everyone’s attention... Can we actually discuss building a zoo now?";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841114 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:43:11")

>one moron out of billions succeeded
>OP will too
I see you're also a moron
ah, plenty of idiots here today"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841118 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:48:15")

sure, OP.
I own a business in Colorado I can give you a few tips and pointers.

First, your insurance and taxes on business property cost about 10X more than those on your house.
Oh, you don't own a house?
Then it's not a problem because no bank is going to mortgage business property to someone that doesn't at least own a fucking house.

strikes one, two, and three. You're out."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841119 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:50:37" && image=="E32EC25F-1070-477A-BE9F-35A5A4496958.png")

Cheyenne Mountain Zoo was a private zoo until the owner died and willed it to the city of Colorado Springs. To this day, it is 100% privately funded. Yet everyone thinks it’s 100x better than Denver Zoo.

Anyways, run along. The cool kids are discussing zoo building now."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841120 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:52:30")

was the original owner an autistic peasant with no income and no property when he started it?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841122 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)02:58:58")

Nonprofits are also called nonbusiness entities because they aren't businesses. Businesses try to make a profit. Zoos not so much."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841123 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:00:06")

Now I feel we’re getting somewhere.

I do have a good income. I do have my own pickup truck and livestock trailer. I even have a place to put a few animals.

The idea is to start a mobile petting zoo first. Getting goats, a couple sheep, and a kid pony will be the next step. Getting gigs to begin with will be hard. I was thinking of doing more public events. Someone suggested anime conventions to me once."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841124 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:01:11")

I’m not trying to get rich. If I can eat and have my own zoo, I’m happy."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841129 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:07:39")

sounds like you have a plan but we both know it won't work. If you actually thought that would work you'd be doing it already. And hell, it might work for someone that has the drive and passion to make it work, but again if you were that person you'd be doing it instead of talking about it.

Look, I make about a million dollars a year in actual sales for my business. I can tell you exactly how I do it and never worry that you'll try to copy me. Because some people talk about doing things and some people just go do them."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841138 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:14:01")

I pinky promise I’ll do it, anon.
Tell me about how you make a million dollars a year."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841140 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:18:04")

I already told you.
I assume the thread is still up.

you won't do it, almost nobody does. That's why it pays so well."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841142 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:19:05")

Also, some of us “peasants” have to save money before they go out and do something. Even if our parents are nigger rich. But at least I don’t have to pay them rent, which allows me to save that money for something I want instead."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841143 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:21:50")

>I make about a million dollars a year in actual sales for my business.
>I can tell you exactly how I do it and never worry that you'll try to copy me.
>proceeds to withhold that knowledge when asked

You’re either LARPing or you’re actually insecure about me knocking you out of the water."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841144 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:23:02")

yep, that's often one of the biggest mistakes in business. You think if you buy the equipment the sales will follow.

actual businessmen know if you make the sales first you'll be able to buy the equipment.

This principle doesn't work so well when you're selling to the public and making tiny sales. But that's a terrible business model and unless they've got millions to gamble with most businesspeople would never try it. Retail to the public is a sucker's game."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841145 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:25:19")

you must have skipped that thread. I'm not withholding shit, I already posted it. The thread is still up.

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841146 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:27:20")

Well go on about a better idea, nigger. We’re building a zoo here, not kicking one down. Kindly get the fuck out if you’re not going to be constructive.
You could’ve said it was on /aq/. Why are you being such a nigger?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841147 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:30:09")

>Kindly get the fuck out if you’re not going to be constructive.
I am being constructive.

I'm telling OP that this thread and his need to save up money are both just procrastination meaning he already knows it's never going to happen."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841148 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:33:41")

Sounds like you’re just being a cunt, but ok.
Not everyone can just ask their dad for a million dollar loan, Donald."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841149 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:36:03")

Moreover, he’s a fucking autist who does not understand his own actions to quite an extend regardless of the fact if he „knew“ how cheeky he may be in some situations.
He is a classic example of some mongoloid who thinks he knows better or anything, when everyone else around him just sees him for a fucking retard because he has proven to be one. Emotionally all over the place, psychotic, dumb as fuck, trying to make himself look better. Class A autist whose fantasies overtook reality for quite some time now. Probably one of the reasons he’s so unhappy as well. But let’s just wait, this is his personal blog, so I’m sure he’ll tell us soon enough."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841150 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:37:34" && image=="B8B9C832-54CE-4FE5-8E05-52AC79271AEA.png")

What does this have to do with zoo building?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841152 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:41:45")

I was homeless 2 years before I made my first million, and nobody gave me a loan.

like I said, some people talk, some people do. Those that do, usually fail. But if they keep trying they'll generally get it right eventually.

if they keep talking they'll never have to worry about failure but they'll also never have to worry about success. OP is a talker. If he was a doer he'd be asking me about how much liability insurance costs and where to go to find pricing and sales."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841153 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:45:21")

>OP is a talker.
I am OP. And you’re being a cunt.
>asking me about how much liability insurance costs and where to go to find pricing and sales
Now that we’re back to discussing zoo building, tell me about how much liability insurance costs and where to go find pricing and sales.
>inb4 lol you’ll never do it so I just won’t tell you
Then I’ll ask my riding instructor about where he gets his and you’ll still be a useless cunt."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841157 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:52:44")

The entire thread is about your inability to be coherent. No fucking wonder people talk about other shit when you had emphasize your own retardation and made this your own blog"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841158 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)03:53:35")

>Then I’ll ask my riding instructor about where he gets his and you’ll still be a useless cunt.
see, you don't need me at all. Or anyone on 4chan for that matter.

Liability insurance is going to run you something like $4k per year payable in one lump sum for the first year and usually monthly instalments after. You can find it through any insurance agent, they pretty much all sell business liability policies.

Pricing can be found by calling any of the other 1000 party and event entertainers doing exactly the same thing in the greater Denver metro area and asking them how much it costs to rent their pony or petting zoo for your kid's birthday. Call a few, see what they offer and how much they charge. You're going to need to be cheaper in most cases. From there you figure how many sales you'll need to make to pay your insurance, taxes, feed, gas, etc. Keep in mind that taxes on your business income are much higher than on income from a job.

Sales will come almost entirely from purchasing a business landline which gets you a yellow pages listing in both the paper directory and online. From there you'll need to spend a few hundred to a few thousand a year getting larger ads in the yellow pages and making a nice website. Because nobody knows you from any other company offering the same services so they base their purchasing decisions off the size of your ads and the quality of your website. Newspaper ads don't hurt either if you're selling to the public, but there's a lot of competition so your ad is probably going to be overlooked in a newspaper. Either way if you're selling to the public a product they rarely use you need to advertise like a monkey on crack and then sit back and wait. I suspect there's not much need for your kind of thing."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841160 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:02:35")

I did it for the (ewes) desu but I just want to discuss zoo building now.
>yellow pages
How old are you? That sounds like some real old school shit. I’m 22 btw. I would agree that a good website is definitely important, though. I feel social media wouldn’t hurt.
>I suspect there's not much need for your kind of thing.
Yeah I guess it’s not as urgent as food and water and shit like that."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841162 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:07:03")

>That sounds like some real old school shit.
it is, but it's the only way the old phone companies make any more money.

the point isn't to get your name in the yellow pages. How do you suppose a business shows up in an internet search? When you google a business the ones that show up are the ones listed in the yellow pages. Because the print phonebook listing automatically gets you an online listing as well.

without that your business name doesn't show up in most searches. It's a scam to sell landlines to businesses, but it's an effective one. If you want to show up on google you need the stupid business line. If you want to be at the top of google you need the business line and SEO."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841163 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:09:12")

You can of course just buy the yellow pages listing alone, but it costs more than a business landline + listing does."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841165 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:15:56")

I didn’t really think about people googling for a petting zoo. Really throws the noggin for a joggin. I really was thinking of doing public events to get my popularity and reputation with the public up. Yeah yeah I know, but this is and has to be more of a hobby than a business in the start. Hopefully it becomes a more and more serious business as things progress and it becomes worth quitting my job for."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841166 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:19:28")

I understand, but for public events the competition is even fiercer and the compliance requirements are much higher. You might get away with not knowing some laws and regulations when you're entertaining at Billy's 5th birthday party, but events are going to scrutinize you like you wouldn't believe. They don't just let random people show up with animals to injure the kids or whatever. The requirements are actually much higher to appear at a public event."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841167 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:19:32")

Who would not be able to get away with this? Just explain what happened and don't sperg out."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841170 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:24:57")

Got to get my foot in the door somehow. How the hell am I supposed to do Billy’s 5th birthday party without a public reputation?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841172 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:26:47")

>How the hell am I supposed to do Billy’s 5th birthday party without a public reputation?
already told you.

you're not going to make sales by trying to convince people that don't want a mobile petting zoo in their yard that they're mistaken.

you're going to make sales by putting a listing for your petting zoo online and then waiting for people that already want one to call you."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841174 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:30:14")

Yeah alright, but I would hate for my very first event to be a kid’s private birthday party. Idk"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841177 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:34:08")

You can do events instead if you like, I just expect them to have much higher insurance, environmental, and legal standards. Not to mention a great deal more competition since you're not just competing with other petting zoos but with all sorts of entertainment including but not limited to bouncy houses, very small trains built from tractors, magicians, clowns, small rollercoasters, and all manner of carnival games and food vendors.

It just seems like that would be an incredibly difficult gig to land, and would cost you far more than the advertising would ever be worth.

I don't know though, that's not my line of work."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841178 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:40:44")

>would cost you far more than the advertising would ever be worth
I just don’t want my first gig to be some rando parent calling me to do their three year old’s birthday party. Once I’ve met a few people in public who are impressed with my operation and ask if I do private gigs, I’ll be comfortable.

Did we miss anything important before we get into how we expand a mobile petting zoo into a regular zoo?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841179 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)04:42:40")

The part where I expand a mobile petting zoo into a regular zoo is actually the one I need the most criticism on so I hope these h8ers haven’t jumped off the h8train yet."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841224 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)06:11:57")

>acacia leaf pressings

Oh lawd. This thread is gold"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841227 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)06:18:06")

So fucking cringe"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841337 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)11:11:00")

"OP is literally just another literal retarded insufferable tumblr autist with a massively inflated ego and dreams of grandeur, and I don't see why anyone should ever help him do anything other than help him work on the personal issues that he blatantly admits to but still shrugs responsibility of off";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841369 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)12:06:56")

OP is also an oldfag and one of 3 posters regularly shitting up the board between actual contributions of interest.

his problems aren't going away any more than he is, and in the meantime his question is interesting if unatainable."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841371 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)12:08:58")

>The part where I expand a mobile petting zoo into a regular zoo is actually the one I need the most criticism
ask your parents how they got rich, because that's what you're going to need to do.

you'll have to buy and improve land without a mortgage because no bank is going to lend you money as is. Either that or you'll need to work 30 years at a real job to get your credit and income in shape to get started. And renting ponies and goats to birthdays and bar mitzvas isn't a real job. Sorry."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841447 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)14:19:57")

>And renting ponies and goats to birthdays and bar mitzvas isn't a real job.
What a salty Sally."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841452 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)14:26:05")

Godspeed, Doctor."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841457 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)14:30:42")

I’m not a literal autist beyond the “special interests” type of shit.
>you'll have to buy and improve land without a mortgage because no bank is going to lend you money as is
Cool. /Where/ should I build the motherfucker?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841877 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)23:14:47")

>Cool. /Where/ should I build the motherfucker?
Since the only bragging point CMZ has is being the highest in the nation you should pick a plot of land 35 feet higher than them. That should place you conveniently near the Dakota Hogback and your old friends at the Morrison Museum."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2841896 && dateTime=="10/12/18(Fri)23:44:23")

>only bragging point CMZ has is being the highest in the nation
They also have the largest giraffe herd in the US."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843056 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:16:02")

"Here's the dilemma.. This zoo would either be a mobile operation or at a fixed location. At a fixed location, you need to offer something that would motivate people to come out to, presumably, your house. This is a large barrier to overcome in order to attract people to your location and would have to be offset by a pretty spectacular showing of animals. On the other hand, you can have a more mobile operation that takes animals to schools or related venues. Here, you would need to give a presentation or a talk about wildlife, biology, nature etc. This would require you to come off as a relatively normal person.";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843061 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:21:55")

As a follow up, I would instead suggest that you speak with guest services whenever you plan to visit a museum, zoo etc. Just be matter of fact about it all and say that you enjoy coming to the zoo but have a disability. Ask if there is any possibility for a guided or structured tour. Be upfront and forthright rather than surprising the staff with unexpected autism."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843067 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:28:47")

this doesn't make any sense, most anyone with a non brainlet IQ would do is just tell you to fuck off. Why waste resources and money on taking some autistic to court over a branch? This is your 9/11 OP, and you can bet your ass the jews are behind it"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843068 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:30:16")

>say that you enjoy coming to the zoo but have a disability
I don’t actually have autism and I’d go as far as saying I’ve “recovered” from the year before."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843076 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:50:43")

"If you are recovered, why are you pursuing such a hail mary replacement for visiting the zoo? Let's say you don't have autism, you still have a history of being repelled from museums and zoos due to behavior. Why not play it safe and talk to guest services as a way to avoid any potential unexpected problems?";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843077 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:50:50")

I really was thinking of starting as a mobile operation and expanding into a public location at some point in time. I really don’t know where to build a public zoo, though. Or how much land I’d need. I’m sure I could talk to a realtor about it."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843078 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:54:03")

I’ve always wanted my own zoo, bro. I’ve been drafting ideas for it since I could pick up writing utensils. My dad is an entrepreneur, too, so I guess it’s in my blood. Idk. I’ve never had a problem with DMNS or any other zoos I’ve been to."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843081 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)07:58:04")

Mobile operation: Do you have a degree or employment that establishes credibility for any organization that may consider hiring your services? You would at least have to be a Bachelor-level "Naturalist" with employment history attached to nature reserves/park departments in order for anyone to view your offering as worthwhile.
In addition, reflect on yourself. Are you the type of person that can interact with children and their guardians (teachers, parents etc.) in a way that can demonstrate effective and knowledgable communication as well as not coming across as unusual or off-putting?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843091 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)08:06:36")

>Bachelor-level "Naturalist" with employment history attached to nature reserves/park departments in order for anyone to view your offering as worthwhile

Not trying to sound like a whiny faggot, but I really resent boomers for getting a total pass on that. Steve Irwin dropped out of fucking high school yet everyone thought he was animal Jesus.

>Are you the type of person that can interact with children and their guardians (teachers, parents etc.) in a way that can demonstrate effective and knowledgable communication as well as not coming across as unusual or off-putting?

Yeah I actually used to give the tours at the Morrison."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843095 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)08:17:39")

Steve Irwin was an outlier among outliers, in reality it is difficult to even land a volunteer gig at a zoo without being an undergrad majoring in a Bio-related field.
As a kid, Biology was my thing. I was the science guy to everyone in my school. I went to nature reserves, open fields, forests, anywhere to collect insect specimens, and collect biological samples. By second grade I was giving talks to different classes in my school about nature and would bring in various living organisms I was currently raising as a demonstration. Hell, I gave a school-wide lecture by 4th grade.
What I'm getting at is, what can you offer that would make you competitive? See it from others point of view. Why would a school hire you out to come talk to them about your animals?"

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843097 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)08:20:48")

I was never thinking of doing school presentations to begin with. I’ll meditate on it, though."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843100 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)08:28:23")

In any event, always try to see it from your potential customer's point of view as a check and balance to your current idea. Your average person isn't going to be charitable. Maybe consider getting part time volunteer experience working with animals at least for a time."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843103 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)08:39:10")

"Have no idea if OP is still here but; you sound like a nice guy and didn't deserve getting sent to court or banned from every nearby zoo for life- just kicking you out that day would have been a far more appropriate consequence.";

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843110 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)09:00:30" && image=="445C2AA7-9735-4570-A7AD-FE346D291B3D.jpg")

>Maybe consider getting part time volunteer experience working with animals at least for a time.
Got any ideas?
CMZ never said I was banned for life. Just banned. I’ve only been there twice ever, both after I was banned from DZ. First time I was there all day and it was great. Second time, I made it up to the ape house before their guest services director and zoo manager got there, addressed me by name, and escorted me out (without security). It was really weird. They were all smiles, telling me they liked my necklace (pic related), offered me a refund... Then when I called guest services a month later to ask him what the deal was he pretended it had nothing to do with Denver Zoo. Really frustrating. It’s bullshit, but I don’t know what to do, lads."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843250 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)13:04:49")

yeah, I'm pretty sure there's more to this story than you're admitting.

Me and my ex wife got banned from Target stores for life because she got caught shoplifting there. We both shop there all the time. Never had anyone escort us out or refuse to take our money.

if your story is true you must have done something pretty amazingly stupid."

if(Anonymous && title=="" && postNumber==2843327 && dateTime=="10/14/18(Sun)14:58:11")

>I'm pretty sure there's more to this story than you're admitting.
Happened just like that, bro. Cross my heart.

I really didn’t."